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EBBA 37211

British Library - 1876.f.1
Ballad XSLT Template
A Living EPITAPH upon the CROWND WOMEN,
OR THE
LOVELY GRANADEERS

IF Job should rise and see this fashion
That Is come now into this Nation,
He would say he never saw
Such Monsters in Arabia:
He'd Daughters fairer then ye know
That never wore a high Cocko,
Isaiah the Prophet tells
That Women did wear Hoods and Bells
In tineling Ornaments went fine
Some had Toers like to the Moon,
For which there was a curse so added
Fair Ladies turn'd bald and scabbed:
And so their Sin did grow so gross,
Turn'd fruitfull Land to Barreness,
Their fault as I suppose was so
Fashioned like to our Cocko
We imitate them very far,
They were ill, but we are war.

The Women now are surn'd so vain,
That every Hussie has a Train:
Some wants a Page to hold it up,
And some does trail it in the Dub:
I mean not by your Ladies fine
Puts on Hawk-hoods before they dine.
But Fidlers, Suters and others Wives
Put on Cocko's like great Bee-hives.
A Burgess Wife, as I heard say
Did wear a Gold Chain on a Day,
And came to see a great Man dine
With this Gold Chain, and Cloaths most fine
For which Extravagance I hear
The Excise was doubl'd that same year.

First when this Habit did appear
For Gold some Men did horns wear:
There's something more I will conceal
The Abby stairs can tell right well:
Where first Cocko's were first invented
They say the Pope and he consented.
This Land is turn'd so wondrous gross
None know an old Wife by a Lass
Unless that they turn up their Tails,
For all their Heads are full of Sails.
There is some Women I am sure
Will spend more money within few year
Upon their heads and eike their tails,
Might pay their Husbands diverse Bills,
The Taverners go on with force
They'l have Cockos tho a bare Arse,
And some has silk hings o're their Doups
By mixt miscounts and ill fill'd Stoups,
They're Granadeers not worth a Plack
For they fight best upon their Back.
When Ladies meets on Street like Dams
They joyn their Heads as they were Rams
As they go mincing on the Street,
They look down to their Golden feet,
And then they cast their heads so light

Looks back't see if their Tail be right
Poor Babes that know not Good or ill
Whom their fond Mothers thus do spill
With Tippets and their high Coko's
Tho' bubles hinging at their Nose;
These innocents are not to blame,
But to their Mothers 'tis a shame,
When men do see they much admire
So much Mortality is here
Those Granadeers comes in behind
With Top sails up before the wind.
Their Gowns and Tails are all indented
Some say the Taylors did invent it
Some call them windy airy Fools,
The Women has been at their Schools
With golden Frenge about their Vails,
And like young Cats play with their tails,
That Ancient trade of merry play
King Solomon himself did say,
That he was made a simple fool
For bieng at the Womans School:
Good honest Sampson he was strong,
But yet a Woman did him wrong
Had Dalila had a Cocko,
She'd Skar'd the D------ and him also
Great things against them in Pauls speeches:
But now they mind to wear the Breeches
If any Woman get her will,
Her Husband surely is a fool;
Unless that he can do no better
But wear the Horns, a simple Matter:
If Sarah or Rebecca saw,
They would say here there is no Law
That Albanie no truth affords,
Since all the Women are turnd Lords:
She call'd Abram Lord had no Cockos,
Or else he from her Tent would go;
Instead of Cocko's or your sails,
Rebecca cover'd her head with Vails,
I wish I could reprove the sin
That in the World did first begin,
For it was pride and arrogance,
Now Beggar Brats do it advance.
Say what I will they'll play their pranks
I fear that I get little thanks.
Catch bomos Wives I must excuse
Their wand and blaze is still in use
They gree together in an unction
Their lives depends on mens destruction
Excuse me all of honest Fame
I have not mentioned your Name:
I tell you all both great and smal,
This fault is Epidemical
Whether high Cocko's be best or worst,
I think the Devil made the first.


FINIS.

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