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EBBA 36282

Society of Antiquaries of London - Broadsides
Ballad XSLT Template
A Replicacion to Camels Objection,

IF right or reason, might move you to speake,
I wold not you blame, your malice to wreake:
Or if your judgement, were upright and cleane,
You wolde not so rudely construe what I meane.
How should your folly, so plainly be knowne,
If that your wisdome, abrode were not blowne.
You byd me amende, whose life you know not,
As though that in you, there were not a spot.
A tale of a tubbe, you bragge and you brall,
wherein you do rubbe your selfe on the gall.
You touch not one poynt, wherof that I wrate.
You leape ore the hedge, and seeith not the gate,
I muse what you meane to discant and preache,
Upon a plaine song, so farre past your reache.
why Camell I say, wyl you needes be fyne,
what wyll ye be knowne for a durty devine.
It seemes you are learned, past reason or wyt,
Or els you coulde not, the marke so well hyt.
You have so good laten, you can want no pewter.
Though ye are no foole, yet you are a newter.
You writ like a clerke, ore seene well in Cato,
Forgetting your name, which Therens cals Gnato.
I can do no lesse, but shew what you are,
Synce you ar a Daniell, darke dreames to declare
Your knowledge is great, your judgement is good,
The most of your study, hath ben of Robyn hood
And Bevys of Hampton, and syr Launcelet de lake,
Hath tought you full oft, your verses to make:
By sweete saint Benet, I swere by no foole,
You are not to learne, you plyde well your scole.
Your wyts are not breched, who list you to preeve,
You flocke and you flout, and smils in your sleeve,
I prayse you no more, lest you thinke I flatter,
I must now retourne, to the pith of my matter,
How can you well prove, that I do envye,
At any estate, be they low or hye,
Or that I spye fauts, in Juppiters seate,
why are you so mad, on me thus to bleate,
It grees not, it cords not, it fyts not you say,
That men shuld find faut, with gods that bere sway
If plaine Davy Dicar, with wise men be skande,
He speaketh uprightly, I dare take in hande.
I write not so rashly, but I rule my pen.
In faith you mistake, Davy Dicars, when,
You take chauke for chese, and day for darke night,
Of like you are spurblinde, or ye loke not a right:
Your purpose I know, you were in such care,
Against this good tyme, your purs was ful bare.
You thought to optaine, some garment or gift,
Then dyd you invent, to make a foule shift,
To flatter the Gods. & get a new cote,
That made you to syng, so mery a note.
You faine me like Judas, you thinke me not so,
For if I were he, then you wold me know,
I beare not the bagge, that mai you rewarde,
But yet my good wyll, I pray you regarde,
You say that order, would have eche degree,
To walke in his calling: then how may this be,
That you out of frame, do blother and barke,
So like a curre dogge, at every good warke,

Is this the order, that Camels doo use?
Bicause you are a beast, I must you exscuse:
A Camell, a Capon, a Curre sure by kynde,
I may you well call, synce so I you fynde:
Bicause you have ratled and railed to mytche,
Now give me good leve, to claw you wher ye ytch
And if that you thinke, I rubbe you to sore,
Then give me no cause, to scratch you no more.
Holde this for certayn, and for a sure thing,
The ofter you styrre me, the more I wyll styng.
Syns that you wyll needes awaken my wyttes,
I wyll seeke for you, both snaffuls and bittes.
To holde in your head, and make you to rayne,
And byte on the bridle, for angre and payne.
Then will I devise for you such a burthen,
As long as you live, you shall beare a lurden:
A Camell by kinde, wyll beare more at once,
Then .iii. great horses, pickt out for the nonce.
More meeter for you, to be in some stable,
To beare heavy burthens, I thinke you more able
Then being as you are, walking abrode,
Your limmes ar well made, to carye a great lode:
All beastes that be made for carte and cariage.
Shuld leane to their labour, as man to his mariage
with horses and Asses, you are well acquainted,
Their maners in ordre, right wel you have painted
I dout of your shape, some monster you are,
Bicause such a name, to me you declare.
Your wordes and your workes, ar tokens right sure
You ar some brute beast, in mans forme & picture.
Right happy he were, that had you in charge,
He shuld gaine moch money, to shew you at large
what cause, or what toye, dyd trouble your mynde,
To make you seeke fauts, wher non you can finde:
Your instrument jarres, your myrth is not sweete,
You play on false striings, which thing is unmeete
Your eare is not good, you know no sweete sounde,
You can not espie, where faut may be founde.
So farre out of tune, I never hearde none,
Nor so much past shame, nor yet so farre gone,
As you in this case, God sende you to amende,
Which seekes to learnr me, to bow and to bende:
Direct well your steppes, by order and lyne,
And sclaunder me not, nor no workes of myne.
In all my writinges, right honestly I ment.
If thei be taken, to my true entent:
Thei shall breede no strife, nor no error sowe.
when truth shal be tryde, and vertue shall flow.
Thus yet once to, when, againe I returne,
Bicause that you seeme, against it to spurne,
Untill this long, when, do well come to passe,
This world shalbe nought, & you shalbe an Asse:
Since you doo invey, alle vice to maintaine,
You shew that you have, a folish light braine:
God send you more wit, now kepe your head warme
Or els the next winter, mai doo you some harme.
Thus here I do ende, and rest for this time,
Excepte you procure me, to make a new rime.


Finis.
Quod. Thomas Churchard.
Imprinted by Rychard Lant.

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