THE
Country Girl's POLICY:
OR,
The Cockney Outwitted.
To a pleasant new Tune.
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ALL you that are to Mirth inclin'd,
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come tarry here a little while,
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Pray read it once, and I do not fear,
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but that it will make you smile.
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The Londoners call us Country Fools,
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and laugh at us every Day;
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But i'll let them see before I have done,
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we know as good Things as they.
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A jolly young Girl in Hertfordshire,
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that had lately learn'd to Dance,
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In less than the space of one whole Year,
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she lit of a Child by Chance:
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Being very Poor, this cunning Whore,
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upon a certain Day,
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Resolved was she, the City to see,
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so to London she took her way,
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With an old Straw Hat, and her Tail pinn'd up,
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with Dirt instead of Fringe,
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Nor long ago this cunning Slut,
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she came to the Royal Exchange,
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With the Child in a Basket under her Arm,
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close cover'd as 'tis said.
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With a clean white Cloth, and at each End
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hung out a Goose's Head,
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She saw Two Stock-Jobbers standing by,
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she then to One did say,
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Gaffer, what stately Church is this?
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come tell to me I pray.
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The other to her smiling said,
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how like a Fool you talk,
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This is no Church, it is the Change,
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where all the Merchants walk.
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Is this the Change, good Sir, she said,
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a glorious Place it be,
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A finer Place in all my Life,
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i never before did see,
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I'll warrant ye there's fine Chambers in 't
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as you and I do live,
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And if you'll let me go and see,
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a Penny to you I'll give.
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The one said, Your Basket I'll hold,
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and tarry here below,
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While my Consort goes up with you,
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the Chambers for to show.
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She answered, I am afraid,
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that when I do come down,
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You will be gone, I would not lose
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my Basket for a Crown.
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I am not such a Man he said,
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and that I'd have you to know;
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She gave it him, and with her Guide,
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she up the Stairs did go.
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She view'd the Pictures very fine,
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and did them much admire,
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He soon dropt her, she down Stairs run,
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and after him did enquire.
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She went up to a Merchant,
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good honest Man said she,
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Did not you see a thick tall Man,
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that had two Geese of me?
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Alas, he said, poor Country Girl,
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our Cocknies are too quick;
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Go home and tell your Country Fools,
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of this fine London Trick.
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She stampt and cry'd, thus to be bit,
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make a Body swear,
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Never to come to the Royal Exchange,
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no more to sell their Ware.
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For by a couple of cheating Rogues.
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alas, I am undone:
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She gave a stampt, and laugh'd aloud,
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and then away she run.
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The Second PART. To the same Tune.
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BUT now we'll to the Jobbers turn,
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who thought they had got a Prize,
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They stept into an Ale-house,
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and sent for both their Wives;
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They told to them the Story,
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with Hearts both merry and light,
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Said they, We will have a Frolick on 't,
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and Roast them both to Night.
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The Women cry'd, No, one at a time,
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and the farther they will go,
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The other we'll have at another House,
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and order the Matter so.
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Thus they began to jangle,
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and got on either side,
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But all this while the Basket stood,
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without ever a Knot unty'd.
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Then opening of the Basket,
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as i the truth unfold,
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There did they find a curious Boy,
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just about five Weeks old.
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The Women flew in a damnable Rage,
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o how they did Scold and Curse:
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instead of a Cook, ye Rogues, say they,
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you must run and call a Nurse.
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The one said, This is your Bastard, Sirrah,
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you've had by some common Whore;
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if this be your Geese, ye Rogues, said she,
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i shall never love Geese no more:
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The one she kick'd the Bottle down,
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the other whipp'd up the Glass,
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And after she had drank the Beer,
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she flung it and cut his Face.
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There was helter skelter, the Devil to pay,
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o how the Pots did fly;
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Just as they were in the midst of the Fray,
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the Child began to cry:
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There was Clouts and Basket all beshit,
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such Sights are seldom seen,
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i hope it will learn them both more Wit,
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how they meddle with Geese again.
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They put it out for three Shillings a Week,
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which is Eighteen Pence a Piece,
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Which they pay every Saturday Night,
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in remembrance of their Geese.
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Come here's a Health to the Country Lass,
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i think she was not to blame,
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If she has but the Wit, to take care of her Twat,
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she may pass for a Maid again.
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