A Pleasant New Song called
The Cony BARBER, Or,
A young Ladies Delight, how she trim'd her Maid, when she was on the Straw asleep.
To a pleasant new West-Country Tune.
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YEa Females draw near, some news you shall hear
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of a Lady that is very well known,
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She is one of the name, that is right for the Game
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but strangely preserved her own;
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Though tender in years, as it plalnly appears
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No fear could her Faculty awe,
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For a Vow she hath made to be one of the Trade;
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which hath made you laugh hah, hah hah, hah.
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No thoughts could expire her earnest desire
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a Cony Barber to be,
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With Instruments neat, and all things compleat
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in short provided had she,
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Her Powder in Box for perfuming your Locks,
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The best that ever you saw,
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Her Raisor so kine if you had fisted between,
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it would have made you laugh hah, hah, hah, hah.
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And likewise her Yeuer, there is none can procure
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in Fair or in City or in Town,
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Her Washing-Ball sweet, if that you do meet,
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the like if you please to lye down,
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Her Sissers and Come, will be sure to reach home,
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She scorns one hair for to draw,
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Her Glass and her Hone, and her Musick at tone,
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that hath made you laugh hah, hah, hah, hah.
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She can paint, she can porl, crisp, powder and curl,
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the French or the Spanish Cut.
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Mischeators or Bear, or what you will wear,
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each Hair in order shee'l put,
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For brushing, for rubbing, for lathering for frubing,
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Whether it be a Frost or a Thaw,
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Her Water Pot, she keeps always hot,
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for to make you laugh, hah, hah, hah, hah.
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When Febus addrest, to view the North West
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and Vesper had seal'd up the day,
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She was not afraid to make use of her Trade.
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in the place where she used to play,
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Where she found out a Maid, whom herself had laid,
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Who soundly slept on the Straw.
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She gave her a trim, if you thither had bin,
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it would have made you laugh, hah, hah, hah, hah.
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She slumbred, she sleept, she sighed and weept,
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strange Visions were inter inscar'd
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She seemed to spy, one shaving so nigh,
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who trimb of the Skin with the Beard,
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And likewise she dreams, and also proclaims
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Some Rook or else some Jack Daw
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Was rid to the Fair, for to sell of that Hair
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that hath made you laugh, hah, hah, hah, ha,
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She was nimble and quick, though she hath gotten the Trick
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yet she dares not her fingers to knock
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Least she should affright, the Slumber in wait,
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before she had ordered her Lock;
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For betwixt the heaps, she opened the Lips
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And found never a Tooth in the Jaw,
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She tripped away without any pay,
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that hath made you laugh, hah, hah, hah, hah.
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With weeping cross, she lamented her Loss
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till the Cony Barber she had found,
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And by a great name, had gotten the Fame
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throughout all the firsenty round,
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They wrangled, they jangled, they strangely entangled
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Like Cats they scratch and they claw,
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It would a yield you delight, for to see such a fight.
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and a made you laugh, hah, hah, hah, hah,
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This Barber complains she so paid for her Pain
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and the Boys cryes it for a may-game,
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To her Mother she goes for to punish all those,
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who dares to give her that Name,
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Her Friends being wise, they thought to surprize
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The business while it was raw,
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To a Justice they giss, which was the way to suppress,
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and to make you laugh, hah, hah, hah, hah,
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Then a brave Troop of Horse, provided there was.
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for to have the businesses well skand
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You must think for a while, how his Worship did smile
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when first took the business in hand;
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He told the time, would extinguish the Crime,
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And the Boys would forget what they saw,
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Likewise time would repair, the loss of that Hair;
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that hath made you laugh, hah, hah, hah, hah,
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Then Mistress Tell-Truth would have taken her Oath,
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that this Maid stole one grain of her Wheat,
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And much to discover, to have her bound over,
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the act was more heinous then great,
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For his Worship knew well when Women Rebel
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No Justice therefore could her awe
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For he bid them deride on every side;
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and burst out with a hah, hah, hah, hah.
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This Maid still said, that she would be paid
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for losing the crop of her Field,
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The Fountain so near with a half yeare
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a better Cut might yield,
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For the Caves was so bare, that no action lay there
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Nor any Commencement in Law,
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For they rid out like Mome, and so they Rid home,
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which hath made you laugh, hah, hah, hah, hah,
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