The Woman's Victory:
OR,
The Conceited Cuckold cudgel'd into good Qualities,
By his fair and vertuous Wife.
To the Tune of, The Languishing Swain, etc.
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YOung marry'd Women, pray attend
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To these few lines which I have penn'd,
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So will you clearly understand,
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How I obtain'd the upper-hand,
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Of my harsh Husband, most unkind,
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Who was to cruelty enclin'd,
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As by the sequel you shall hear,
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No Mortal e're was so severe.
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My birth and education shows,
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I was not qualify'd for blows;
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Yet I so many did receive,
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That night and day my soul did grieve.
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My Parents had no Child but I,
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Therefore their care continually,
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Was still to have me marry'd well;
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Yet under Fortune's frowns I fell.
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A wretched Miser marry'd me,
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Whose age was threescore years and three,
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And I no more than seventeen;
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Would I his face had never seen.
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Before we long had marry'd been,
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This aged Miser did begin
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To have some jealous thoughts of me,
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And then began my misery.
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When I abroad with him did go,
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Perhaps to see a Friend, or so,
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If any Man saluted me,
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It strait encreas'd his jealousie.
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And then at night when we come home,
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He would with rage and fury foam,
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Nay, likewise kick and spurn me too,
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While my poor limbs were black and blew.
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I wonder'd at the cause of this,
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Or what he found so far amiss,
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Which should create such hateful strife,
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For I was weary of my life.
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At length I found the mischief bred
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Within his aged jealous head,
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And thereupon I found a way,
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His rage and malice to allay.
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Soon after this, we went one night
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To reap the pleasures of delight,
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Among some Friends in merriment,
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The which did cause much discontent.
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A Squire drank a glass to me,
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I pledg'd the Youth in modesty,
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Thinking no harm, yet ne'ertheless,
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He did my sides and shoulders dress.
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His bitter blows I could not bear,
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Therefore next morning, I declare,
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Wile he was sleeping fast in bed,
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I with a ladle broke his head.
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With that he starts and stares about,
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I stood couragious, fierce and stout,
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Crying, I'll never be your Slave;
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With that another bang I gave.
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He with a cudgel run at me,
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I took a club as well as he,
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Crying, I am resolv'd to try
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Who shall be Master you or I.
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I gave him not a minute's rest,
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But round the room the Rogue I drest,
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At length I brought him to his knees,
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Henceforth I'll never you displease.
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This was his cry, still o're and o're:
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Quoth I, Will you be jealous more?
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No, no, I wont, sweet loving Wife,
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If thou'lt be pleas'd to spare my life.
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Pray keep your word, I then reply'd,
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Or else, adsfoot, I'll thrash your hide;
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You must not think that I'll be fool'd,
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Or in the least be over-rul'd.
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Thus I my Husband did subdue,
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I'faith I made him buckle too,
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Now ever since the truth to tell,
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With him I live exceeding well.
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He never offers now to fight,
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But calls me love and hearts delight;
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Thus, loving Neighbours, you may see,
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I cur'd him of his jealousie.
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