A True CHARACTER
OF
Sundry Trades and Callings:
OR,
A New Ditty of Innocent Mirth.
This Song is New, and perfect True,
there's none can this deny;
For I am known, Friend, to be one
that scorns to tell a Lye.
To the Tune of, Old Simon the KING.
This may be Printed, R.P.
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NOw Gentlemen sit you all merry,
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i'll sing you a Song of a Want,
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I'll make you as merry as may be,
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though Monies begin to grow scant:
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A Woman without e're a Tongue,
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she never can scold very loud;
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'Tis just such another great Want,
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when the Fidler wants his Crowd:
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Good People I tell unto you,
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these Lines they are absolute new,
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For I hate and dispise the telling of Lies,
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this Ditty is merry and true.
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A Ship that's without e're a Sail,
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may be driven the Lord knows whither;
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'Tis just such another sad Want,
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as the Shoe-maker wants his Leather:
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A Man that has got but one Legg,
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will make but a pittiful Runner,
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And he that has no Eyes in his Head,
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will make but a sorrowful Gunner:
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Good People I tell unto you,
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these Lines they are absolute new,
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For I hate and dispise the telling of Lies,
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this Ditty is merry and true.
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A Doctor without any Stomach,
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will make but a pittyful Dinner,
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And he that has got no Victuals to eat,
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will quickly look thinner and thinner:
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A Bell without ever a Clapper,
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will make but sorrowful Sound,
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And he that has no Land of his own,
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may work on another Man's Ground:
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Good People I tell unto you,
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these lines they are absolute new,
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For I hate and despise the telling of Lies,
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this Ditty is merry and true.
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A Black-smith without his Bellows,
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he need not rise very soon,
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And he that has no Cloaths to put on,
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may lye in his Bed till noon:
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An Inn-keeper without any Custom,
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will never get store of Wealth,
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And if he has ne'r a Sign to hang up,
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he may e'ne go hang up himself:
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Good People, etc.
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A Miller without any Stones,
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he is but a sorrowful Soul,
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And if that he has no Corn to grind,
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he need not stand taking of Toll:
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The Taylor we know he is loath
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to take any Cabbidge at all,
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If he has no Silk, Stuff or Cloath,
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to do that good Office withal.
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Good People, etc.
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A Woman without e're a Fault,
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she like a bright Star will appear;
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But a Brewer without any Mault,
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will make but pittiful Beer:
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A Man that has got but one Shirt,
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when e're it is washt for his hide,
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I hope it can't be no great hurt,
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to lye in his Bed till 'tis dry'd,
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Good People, etc.
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A Mountebank without his Fools,
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and a Skip-kennel turn'd out of Place,
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A Tinker without any Tools,
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they are all in a sorrowful case:
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You know that a Dish of good Meat,
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it is the true Stay of Man's Life,
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But he that has nothing to eat,
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he need not to draw out his Knife.
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Good People, etc.
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A Pedler without e're a Stock,
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it makes him look pitiful blew;
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A Shepherd without e'er a Flock,
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has little or nothing to do:
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A Farmer without any Corn,
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he neither can give, sell or lend;
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A Huntsman without e'er a Horn,
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his Wife she must stand his good Friend.
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Good People, etc.
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A Plow-man that has ne'er a Plow,
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I think may live at his ease;
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A Dairy without e're a Cow,
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will make but bad Butter and Cheese.
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A Man that is pittiful poor,
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has little or nothing to loose;
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And he that has never a Foot,
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it saves him the buying of Shooes.
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Good People, etc.
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A Warren without e'er a Coney,
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is barren, and so much the worse;
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And he that is quite without Money,
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can have no great need of a Purse.
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I hope there is none in this place,
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that now is displeas'd with this Song:
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Come buy up my Ballads apace,
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and i'll pack up my awls and be gone.
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Good People I tell unto you,
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these Lines they are absolute new,
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For I hate and dispise the telling of Lies,
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this Ditty is merry and true.
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