A NEW-YEARS-GIFT
FOR THE
RUMP.
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YOu may have heard of the Politique Snout,
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Or a tale of a Tub, with the bottom out,
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But scarce of a Parliament in a shitten clout.
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Which nobody can deny.
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'Twas Atkins first serv'd this Rump in with Mustard,
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The Sawce was a compound of Courage, and Custard;
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Sr. Vane bless'd the Creature: Noll snufled, and Bluster'd.
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Which nobody can deny.
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The Right was as then, in Old Olivers Nose,
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But when the Devil, of that did dispose,
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It Descended from thence, to the Rump, in the Cloze.
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Which nobody can deny.
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Nor is it likely there to stay long,
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The Retentive faculties being gone,
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The Juggle is stale, and Money there's none.
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Which nobody can deny.
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The Secluded Members made a Trial
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To Enter, but them the Rump did defy all,
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By the Ordinance of Self denial.
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Which nobody can deny.
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Our Politique Doctors do us Teach,
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That a Bloud-sucking Red-coat's as good as a Leech,
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To Relieve the Head, if appli'd to the Breech.
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Which nobody can deny.
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But never was such a worm as Vane;
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When the State scour'd last, it voided him then,
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Yet now he's crept into the Rump again.
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Which nobody can deny.
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Ludlows Fart, was a Phrophetique Trump:
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(There never was anything so Jump)
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'Twas the very Type, of a vote of this Rump.
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Which nobody can deny.
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They say 'tis good Luck, when a Body rises
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With the Rump upward; but he that advises
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to Live in that Posture, is none of the wisest.
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Which nobody can deny.
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The Reason is worse, though the Rime be Untoward,
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When things proceed with the wrong end Forward,
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But they say their's sad news to the Rump, from the Nor'ward.
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Which nobody can deny.
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'Tis a wonderfull thing the strength of that Part,
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At a Blast, it will take you a Team from a Cart;
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And Blow a mans Head away with a Fart.
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Which nobody can deny.
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When our Brains are Sunck below the Middle,
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And our Consciences steer'd by the hey-down-Diddle,
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Then things will go round without a Fiddle.
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Which nobody can deny.
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You may Order the City with a Hand Granado,
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Or the General with a Bastonado,
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But no way for a Rump like a Carbonado.
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Which nobody can deny.
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To make us as famous in Council, as Wars,
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Here's Lenthal, a Speaker for mine------
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And Fleetwood is a man of Mars.
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Which nobody can deny.
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'Tis pitty that Nedhams Fall'n into Disgrace,
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For he Orders a Bumme with a marvellous Grace,
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And ought to attend the Rump by his Place.
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Which nobody can deny.
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Yet this in spight of all Disasters,
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Although he hath Broken the Heads of his Masters,
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'Tis still his Profession, to give 'em all Plasters.
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Which nobody can deny.
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Let em cry down the Pope, till their Throats are sore,
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Their design was to bring him in at the Back-door:
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For the Rump ha's a mind to the scarlet whore.
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Which nobody can deny.
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And this is a Truth at all hands confest,
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However unskilfull in any of the rest,
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The Rump speaks the Language of the Beast.
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Which nobody can deny.
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They talk that Lambert is like to be try'd
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For Treason, and Buggerie beside,
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Because that he did the Rump bestride.
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Which nobodie can deny.
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The Rump's an old storie, if well understood,
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'Tis a thing dress'd up in a Parliaments Hood,
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And like't, but the Tayl stands where the Head should.
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Which nobodie can deny.
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'Twould make a man scratch, where it does not itch,
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To see forty Fools Heads in one Politique Breech,
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And That, --- Hugging the Nation as the Devil did the witch.
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Which nobodie can deny.
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From rotten Members preserve our Wives:
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From the mercie of a Rump, our Estates and our Lives:
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For they must needs go, whom the Devil Drives.
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Which nobodie can deny.
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