The Contented Cuckold, or
Patience upon force is a Medcine for a Mad Man.
You batchellors both young and old
give ear unto this ditty,
A story here I will unfold
in mirth I hope it will fit ye,
A batchellor of threescore years
a Damsel young did marry
Now he complains she doth him wrong
and basely doth miscarry:
Near Worksworth Town in Darby-shire
this couple they do dwell,
With patience pray this ditty hear
and then I bid farewell.
To the Tune, She cannot hold her Legs together.
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YOu young Men all to you I call
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whether you live in Town or City,
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A Warning take by this my fall
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which I shall declare in this my ditty
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When as you do a Wooing go
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pray have a care you be not scorned,
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For if fortune say it must be so
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you soon may come for to be horned.
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A Batchellor full threescore years
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I lived long in joy and pleasure,
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I was quite v[o]id of grief and cares
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I had house & Land & store of Treasure,
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I did provide Mony to hide,
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at last blind Cupid he me Wounded,
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W[it]h a da[rt] of Love but now I can prove
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[m]y heart with grief is almost drownded.
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Then to Cupids Court I did resort
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and there I met with Venus Sister,
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Full threescore pound a true report
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I gave for Mally would God I had mist her
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To make her gay I slung away
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full ten pound more to buy her cloathing
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Still my Estate goes to decay
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for to Cuckold me she counts it nothing.
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All Darby-shire could not compare
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with pritty Mally for Wit and beauty
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I thought she was a Jewel rare
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which made me dote in love and duty
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With a Forehead high and Rouling eye
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which signifies that she loves sporting,
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She scorns with me now for to lye
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but to, etc.
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A Young Man living in the Town
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has stollen from me her love & duty,
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No comfort I get but a frown
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not scarce a look upon her beauty:
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For all her delight both day and night
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is in his company for sporting
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The boys cry Cuckoo in my sigh[t]
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for to Cuckold me she counts it nothing.
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My aged looks she doth disdain
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with taunts and jears I now am scorned
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My bed likewise she doth refrain
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by Dick it is I must be horned,
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Thus Mary she abuseth me
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which makes my friends to jear & scoff me
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And the boys cry Cuckoo in my sight
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because Dick doth make a Cukold of me
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My means they Wast both night and day
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most wilfully without all measure
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My Goods and Cattle is their prey
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they seek all means to Wast my treasure
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While they do Sing my hands I Wring
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which makes my friends to jear & scoff me
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And the boys, etc.
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Now may I sigh lament and mourn
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I do confess it was my folly,
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Now I may I sit like an idle drone
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or like one struck in a Melancholly,
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While Mary and Dick doth play the trick
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of Put In, Or else get of me,
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In house or barn if weather warm
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there Dick must make a Cuckold of me.
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Thus night and day they spend away
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their time in this unlawful carriage,
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Which makes me cry as well I may,
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to curse the day and time of Marriage
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My Garments bare and my White Hair
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and my Fore-man with her is scorned,
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The boys cryes Cuckoo to my face
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and says that Dick my head has horned
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You Batchellors and married men
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whether you live in Town or City,
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Let me intreat you once again
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to read this harmless ditty,
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No harm at all is in this Wall-
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For all poor Robin now is scorned,
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Pray do not jear at Robin here
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you know not who may next be horned.
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Now the Proverb old I think upon
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sayes a Cuckold is a good mans fellow
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My time is spent I must be gone
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come fill's a cup of Ale that's mellow
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For Mal and Dick will play the trick
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of Put In, Or else get of me,
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In house or barn etc.
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Now to conclude and make an end
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hoping I have no Man offended,
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Nor yet done wrong to any friend
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he that thinks so pray let him mend it,
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For Mary and Dick will play the trick
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of Put In, Or else get of me,
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And the boys cry Cuckoo to my face
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because Dick doth make a Cuckold of me.
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