JOANS Victory
Over her Fellow-Servants.
A Young-man that with many Maids does dwell,
Thought Joan the rest in beauty did excell;
Mall was too coy, Jenny was too bold,
Kate was too stale, and Nanny was a scold:
That he dislikes them all, and would with none
Be pleas'd, but with his fair and dearest Joan.
Tune of, My own sweet Nichol a Cod.
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IVe liv'd in this Town these 5 Years,
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but never the Lass could find
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That would prove so true a Lover,
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as constant and as kind:
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Now fortune has me befriended,
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at last to give me one;
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Whose true love I discover,
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then here's a good Health to Joan.
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I once loved Kate and Jenny,
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and once I loved Mall;
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And then my love turned to Nancy,
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but now I dislike them all:
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For I have gotten a true love,
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whom I affect alone;
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'Tis she best pleaseth my fancy,
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then here's a good health to Joan.
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With Cate I'de a short encounter,
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because she was plaguy old,
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Her Letchery was so hasty,
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that my love soon grew cold:
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She proffered me Figgs of the best sort,
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but I told her I'de have none,
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cause the strenyth of her breath was so nasty
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but here's a good health to Joan.
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At length a wonderful kindness,
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as possible may be thought,
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Did pass betwixt me and Jenny,
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bur this was her only fault;
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She stradled so wide, and came on so fast.
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that she made me cry out, be gone,
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For I think the Devil is in you,
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then, etc.
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But then there was a secret Court there,
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betwixt our Mall and I;
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And she of her love was so tender,
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that I hated her Modesty:
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She was so much given to frowning,
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and killing glances prone;
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That on no terms she'd surrender,
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then here's a good health to Joan.
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At last I had a warm passion
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for Nanny my dear heart;
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But whenever her I courted,
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she was too brisk and smart:
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She'd gotten a Tongue with a tang in't,
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and a trick to herself alone;
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That she kick'd like a Colt when we sported
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then, etc.
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Then since i've gotten a sweet-heart,
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that is both loving and true;
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All old Fish i'le defie,
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and learn to deal with new:
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For I hate to imbrace a Carcass
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that's nothing but skin and bone;
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And has never a whit of beauty,
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then, etc.
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Since Jenny then was so forward,
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and impudent withal;
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I thought it fit to leave her,
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and my kindness to recall:
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For I hate such buxome Lasses,
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they'l Cuckold me ten to one;
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'Twas policy then to deceive her,
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then, etc.
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Nor will I fix my heart on
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those Maids that are too coy;
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For Moll she was so squemish,
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that she my love did cloy:
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Then give me the Lass that is loving,
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and not so scrupulous grown;
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For that is the Lass without blemish,
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then, etc.
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Nor i'le have no more of this scolding,
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which will but end my days;
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She is worse then a smoaky Kitchin,
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which always plagues your eyes.
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Her tongues the worst part about her,
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for it is always prone
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To chatting, and damming, and itching,
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then, etc.
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Now 'twould be a thing that's needless;
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to tell how I dearly love
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She that my heart has wounded,
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and does my passion move:
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She has none of those damnable errors
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to which most Maids are prone:
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On her vertues my love is grounded,
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then, etc.
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She's neither old nor mouldy,
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she's neither coy nor bold,
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Nor has she faults of Nancy,
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she's neither Shrow nor Scold:
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Then she is the Maid that i'le marry,
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she has none of these faults of her own,
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Therefore she best pleaseth my fancy,
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then here's a good health to Joan.
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