Two-penny-worth of Wit for a Penny:
OR, THE
Bad HUSBAND turn'd Thrifty.
When he his Race had fully run,
And had repented what was done;
With Care he did amend his ways,
And now his Neighbours speaks his Praise.
To the Tune of, Packington's Pound.
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ALL Company-keepers come hear what I say,
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Here's a notable Song if you please for to stay,
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It will learn you good Counsel, be rul'd by a Friend,
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If you go to an Ale-house your Money to spend:
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For Fourpence or Sixpence, you may spend I do say,
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If you call any higher it's all thrown away;
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Then Barnaby will begin to work in your head,
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There's many does forget that their Children want Bread.
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Observe a good hour and loose not your time,
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If you meet with a Friend that you needs must go drink,
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I desire you to take this Counsel of mine,
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Keep Wit in your Noddle, and your Pockets some Chink:
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Then your Wife will be pleased, your Children glad,
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And a great deal of Comfort there will be to be had:
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But if you spend all your Mony and make yourself poor,
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Then your rent will be wanting you'll be turn'd out of door
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To see some Men when they are full of drink,
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What a beastly condition it is we may think,
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That they hardly can know one Man from another,
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They abuse their best Friend if it were their own Brother,
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They'll tumble i'th' dirt, and they'll stagger i'th' street,
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And affront e'ry Man and Woman they meet,
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That when they are sober will scorn to do so,
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For they hardly can know their Friend from their Foe.
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For I my ownself have been in the same way,
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And wasted my Money by night and by day,
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And never did think how my Children was serv'd,
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Till Neighbours did say that they almost were starv'd:
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If my Wife chance to say that any thing she did lack,
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I would call her base Whore, and be sure pay her back:
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That was the best Comfort I could her afford,
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Then I out to the Ale-house, and spent like a Lord.
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I sold all my Goods, and I wasted my Store,
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And at the long run I was grown very poor,
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A hundred and fifty good Pounds I have spent,
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As long as any was left I could not be content:
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My Hostess she would be so merry with me,
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When I call'd in for Liquor and paid for't too free;
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And with slabering and kissing she pleas'd me to th' life,
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Thus I like a Villain did wrong my poor Wife.
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At last I consider'd and did think in my mind,
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How to my own Family I had been too unkind,
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Which troubles my Conscience to think on the same,
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That with drinking and swilling I was much to blame,
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My Children was bare, and hard they did fare,
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And I of their Misery never took care,
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But now I'll begin for to live a new life,
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And take pains to maintain both my Children and Wife.
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For I to the Ale-house have been too kind,
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Which to my undoing I plainly do find,
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My poor little Children are fallen into Want,
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Which grieves me to see them, full sore I repent,
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That I had such fortune for to be so led,
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With drunken Companions, which caus'd me be bad,
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But he runs a long Race that ne'er has an end,
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I'll make much of my Money that God does me send.
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I'll be careful of my Children, and make much of my Wife,
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And provide Meat and Drink for to preserve their Life,
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That little that's left I hope to make it more,
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With taking of pains, and with working full sore:
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And Ale-wives go hang themselves with what they have got,
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No more of my Money shall fall to their lot;
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I have sow'd my wild Oats, and I will have a care
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Of drunken Companions that made me so bare.
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It is a brave thing when Winter comes cold,
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To have something in store, with that a Man may be bold,
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Either Land-men or Sea-men what-ever they be,
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All young Men consider be ruled by me,
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For Hostesses and Tap-houses will fill you no beer,
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No longer then your Money holds out you may swear,
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For I my own self now do find it too true,
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Which makes me to speak, for what I spent I do rue.
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Since I took a good course and forsaken the bad,
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With my Wife and my Children there is enough to be had,
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But while I kept Drinking and loosing my Time,
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All my whole Houshould was ready to pine:
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But it is a long Day that ne'r has an end,
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Therefore all good Fellows be rul'd by a Friend,
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Keep Mony in your Pockets and good Cloaths to your Back,
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Drink to yourselves good, but take heed of a Crack.
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Now in the Conclusion, that Man is well blest,
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That lives sober and quietly, and forgoes Drunkenness,
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He never will be out of reason with his Wife,
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If God give him a Blessing he's free from all strife,
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It is a brave thing if a Man do take pains,
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If he works ne'r so hard if he bring home the gains;
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Therefore take this Counsel I pray you of mine,
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It's penny well bestow'd, he that takes up in time.
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