THE
Norfolk Stiff-Rump:
OR
The Apple-Dumpling Eater.
Giving an Account, how one Rogers of Lexham in Norfolk,
by Vertue of Apple-Dumplings, got his Wife with
Child of Nine Boys at a time.
Tune of Winchester-Wedding
Licensed according to Order.
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I.
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IN Norfolk there Liveth a Yeoman,
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At Lexham, a Town in that Shire,
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More Lusty than ever I knew Man,
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A Prince of a Man I will Swear;
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He Eats so much Dumpling they say,
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That (not to Belye him in Rhyme,)
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He show'd his Wife delicate Play,
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And got her Nine Boys at a time.
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II.
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And had not the Bed yielded to him,
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Besides what I told you before,
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All Men that ever yet knew him,
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Do think that he had gotten Three more;
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For Dumpling so strengthned his Back,
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It is such a delicate thing,
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That his Bedfellow he held to Tack,
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For Dumpling is Food for a King.
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III.
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You Women that Pray for a Baby,
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Whose Husbands are Feeble and Old,
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Must Eat as much Dumpling as may be;
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'Twill make 'em both Lusty and Bold,
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'Tis Dumpling prolongs a Mans Life,
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And makes him with ease do the Thing,
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'Tis Dumpling joyns Husband and Wife,
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And Dumpling is Food for a King.
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IV.
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When Man has been hard at his Labour,
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All vexed with Sorrow and Care,
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Then something you know has some favour,
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for Dumpling is delicate Fare;
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It makes a Man fit for the Work,
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And fits him so well for the the thing,
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He gets you a Boy at a Jerk,
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Oh! Dumpling is Food for a King.
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V.
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If Dumpling was once but in Fashion,
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Then Whoring would quickly go down,
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There would be no Cuckholds i'th' Nation;
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For all would make use of their Own;
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The Bawds would turn Honest and True,
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And sadly Peccavi would Sing,
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And Men would live quietly too,
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For Dumplins is Food for a King.
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VI.
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The King would never want Seamen,
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To Fight on his Royal Concerns,
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London would never want Freemen,
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Nor Women a Man for their Turns;
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We all should be Happy and Blest,
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Nay, doubly Blest in the Thing,
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I speak it without any Jest,
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That Dumpling is Food a for King.
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VII.
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And now all you Maids that Love young Men,
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And that are designed to wed;
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If you would have them be strong Men,
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O let them with Dumplins be fed;
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Dyet them well for the Race
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With Dumplins that delicate Thing,
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And fear not they'l scoure your Chace,
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For Dumplins is Food for a King.
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VIII.
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Then both at Dinner and Supper,
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Be sure to bring in this Dish,
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'Twill rarely well strengthen his Crupper
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As much as a Woman can wish.
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Instead of a Posset of Sack,
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Be sure some Dumplins to bring,
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'Twill mightily strengthen his Back;
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For Dumplins is Food a for King.
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