The GALLANT's Wish:
OR,
His earnest desire to be deliver'd from a WOMAN,
OF
Various evil DISPOSITIONS and cross-grain'd QUALITIES.
To the Tune of, O brave Popery, etc. Licensed according to Order.
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FRom a Woman who thirty long Winters has seen,
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Yet by patching and painting, and bathing her skin,
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Appears plump and young as a Girl of fifteen:
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The Fates deliver us, Heavens deliver us,
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For they are desperate things.
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From One who in Meetings is always in motion,
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Or to Church, hourly gadding, pretending Devotion,
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Her ways are unknown, like the ways of the Ocean:
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The Fates deliver us, etc.
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From One who is always a scolding and railing,
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'Gainst the faults of her Sex and their ludeness bewailing
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Twenty pound to a Cherry-stone she has her failing:
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The Fates deliver us, etc.
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From One who pretends to more Tongues then her own,
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And in French and Italian a Student is grown,
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When one Tongue is enough for a Woman 'tis known:
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The Fates deliver us, etc.
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From One who e[ach] night to the Play-house still goes,
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To show her fine Face, or her much finer Coaths,
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And receives the Addresses of Sharpers and Beaus:
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The Fates deliver us, etc.
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From a raw Country Girl, who got all her breeding
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In a Village, where cows, swine, & poultry were feeding,
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And never was taught either wrieting or reading:
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The Fates deliver us, Heavens deliver us,
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For they are desperate things.
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From a Citizen's Daughter, whose dugling charms,
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Will eagerly take a young Fop in her arms;
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And from an old Widow, with scolding alarms,
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The Fates deliver us, Heavens deliver us,
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For they are desperate things.
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From a sanctify'd Widow, if such there be any,
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Who pretends she can love none though courted by many:
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From One with six Children and never a penny:
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The Fates deliver us. etc.
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From a Lass of Intreague, who before she was wed,
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Could willingly take a young Lad in her Bed;
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From One who has ne'er a good Tooth in Head:
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The Fates deliver us, etc.
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From such a One, who a Town-mistress has been,
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Who surfits herself in the pleasure of sin;
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And from One who strives for to draw a Man in:
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The Fates deliver us, etc.
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From One who in thought, is as lude as a Stallion,
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Who tipples Canary, wholesale by the Gallon;
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From One that's as jealous as any Italion:
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The Fates deliver us, etc.
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From taking a Wife here for better or worse,
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And keeping another Man's Children at Nurse;
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From One that brought nothing, yet will have the Purse:
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The Fates deliver us, etc.
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From the horrible torment of leading my life,
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With One that is nothing but Tumult and Strife;
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From One that is more like Old Nick than a Wife:
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The Fates deliver us, etc.
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From One that is commonly subject to weep,
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And will not her Husband's good company keep;
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From One that is subject to Fart in her sleep:
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The Fates deliver us, Heavens deliver us.
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For they are desperate things.
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