Whose there Agen:
OR,
The 6-penny Cuckold of Shoreditch his Policy.
Poll[i]cy still, the proverb saith;
beyond Strength it doth go;
And if you mind, you'l surely find
that it is even so.
To the Tune of, Daniel Cooper.
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GOod People all I pray give ear,
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and listen to my Ditty:
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A story true you now shall hear,
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was done near London City:
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A Drunken Sot, that lov'd the Pot,
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his folly did discover,
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My story mind, and you shall find,
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it was a lisping Glover.
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This Glover he lov'd Company,
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did often stay out late Sir,
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But did not think, while he did drink,
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his Wife would horn his Pate Sir;
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And often she would lay the Key,
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so that he might get in Sir
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And not make her rise out of Bed
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but now the Game begins Sir.
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One night when he was tipling hard,
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a Neighbour came to see her,
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She bid him not to be afraid,
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her Husband was not near,
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By joynt consent, then to't they went,
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the door full fast she locked,
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Her Husband he came presently,
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but the Key was in her Pocket.
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In sweet Embraces there they lay,
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he willing was to please her,
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Her husband fumbling long time lay,
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but could not find the Key Sir:
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This valiant man, his shoulder then,
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against the door he placed,
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And by his strength, got in at length,
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but they lay both amazed.
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Unto the Bed-side then he went,
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and for her head he felt Sir,
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The Neighbour was in such a sweat,
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he ready was to melt sir;
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Whose head is this, the Glover said,
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quoth she, 'tis my head truly,
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But another he felt presently,
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which made him grow unruly.
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Unto the Beds-feet then he goes,
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nought could his passion smother
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And felt two legs, two feet and toes,
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at last he felt another;
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Two heads, quoth he, and three Legs too,
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sure thou art grown a Monster,
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His neighbour near, supriz'd with fear,
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his very heart did pant sir.
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The Glover felt for th' Tinder-box,
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and for to strike a Light sir,
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As with the Flint the steel he knocks,
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i'th middle of the night sir:
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Pat, pat, went something on the floor,
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the Neighbour he was frighted,
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And naked stood behind the door,
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till the Candle it was lighted.
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The Glover of a courage bold,
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whose there, aloud he cryed,
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His neighbour quaking stood i'th cold,
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but could not be espyed;
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Who's there agen, quoth this stout man,
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but no body made answer.
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O then, quoth he, i'le surely see,
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who did so softly dance sir.
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Behind the door he then espies
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his near and loving Neighbour,
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What makes you here, the Glover cries,
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i'le pay you for your labour;
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Neighbour to buy a pair of Gloves,
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was all that I intented,
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Oh then, quoth he, assuredly,
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you now shall be befriended.
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His hand he fitted presently,
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who then did ask the price sir,
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They're worth two shillings sir, quoth he,
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you cannot it deny sir;
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But cause you are my Neighbour near,
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i'le take but eighteen pence sir,
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Pay me and then my Chamber clear,
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'tis time to get you hence sir,
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He drest himself, and away he went,
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for joy the Glover jumped,
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And to his wife aloud he cries,
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your Rogue I now have mumped;
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Because he me a Cuckold made,
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to cheat him I was willing,
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And eighteen pence for Gloves he paid,
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that were not worth a shilling.
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The six-penny Cuckold did rejoyce,
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that he had c[?]ous'd his Neighbour;
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And said, though he a Cuckold was,
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he was pay'd well for his labour;
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Though some do scoff, and some deride,
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and held it in dis[d]ain so,
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If I catch him by my Bed-side,
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i'se sell him Gloves again so.
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And you that have got wanton Wives,
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I pray of them be wary;
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For they love pushing as their lives,
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and love a Man that's hairy;
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For he can stoutly do the feat;
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and his wantonness discover;
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Like him that put this cunning Cheat
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upon this subtile Glover.
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