The subtil Miss of LONDON; OR, The Ranting Hector well fitted by this cunning Miss, Who by putting certain Ingredients into his Wine, laid him into a deep sleep, and striping his Gallant At- tire, cloathed him in a red Petticoat, and a Coyf on his Head; then sent him in a great Chest by water to Gravesend . To the Tune of, The two English Travellers. This may be Printed, R. P.
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A Miss who near London did set up her Trade,
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And whilst she did use it, some projects she play'd,
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Amongst all the rest, here is one I declare,
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The like of this humour you seldom did hear.
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As she was a ranging along in the street
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A Ranting brave Gallant she chanced to meet;
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His Coat was of Velvet, a Sword by his side,
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He feared no dangers, whatever betide.
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This Gallant no sooner had fixed his Eyes
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Upon her fair Beauty, but straight he replyes,
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I'le give thee a Guinea , so I may enjoy
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Those tender embraces; sweet Love be not coy.
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To seal this kind promise, he gave her a Kiss;
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O Fie, fie, forbear Sir, what mean you by this?
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Your words are so winning, I grant your demand,
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What Damsel is able your force to withstand?
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They straight struck a bargain and made no delay,
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To her habitation they posted away,
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Where with her old Mother this Miss she did dwell;
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Now listen, i'le tell you what after befel.
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A Dinner of Dainties they straight did prepare,
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For their jovial pastime, no charges they'd spare;
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But yet I must tell you, it soon came to pass,
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Tho' they found the meat, yet he paid for the sawce.
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For Claret, Canary, he freely did call,
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To show himself noble, he'd pay for it all;
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And thus he appeared most jovial and free,
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They all were as merry as merry might be.
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They ply'd him with Bumpers, which he ne'r deny'd
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And likewise with other ingredients beside,
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They gave him in order, his courage to cool,
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Which quickly did make him as wise as a fool.
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This Liquor up into his Noddle did creep,
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So that in short time they had laid him to sleep;
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His Reason and Senses was perfectly fled,
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With their subtile Doses, as if he were dead.
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Then, then they went on with their rifling trade,
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And of this brave Gallant a Booty they made,
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He had store of Silver, both Guineas and Rings,
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His Watch and Broad-Pieces, and other rich things.
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Thus while he was sleeping they stript off his Cloaths
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His Hat, Wigg and Cravat, his Shirt Shoes & Hose;
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Then being as naked as e're he was born,
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In other Apparrel they did him adorn.
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A course Hempen Smock they did put him on there,
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One which the old Woman was used to wear;
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A red Petticoat, with a Coif on his Pate,
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Then he was array'd at a notable rate.
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They put him into a great Chest that stood there,
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And made a small hole for to let in the air;
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So great was the kindness which to him they show'd,
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They called a Porter to take up this load.
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This Gallant had told them he had at Gravesend ,
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An Uncle who was his particular Friend;
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And therefore to Billingsgate they did repair,
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And hir'd a Boat-man to carry him there.
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As soon as the Chest was set safe in the Boat,
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To the Waterman they delivered a Note,
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And bid him be careful his trust to discharge,
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He vow'd he wou'd do it, their pay being large.
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But now at the last comes the cream of the jest,
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He knew not what treasure he had in the Chest,
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Until at Gravesend he had set him on shore,
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Then, then he awaken'd and never before.
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It was about twelve of the Clock in the night,
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They call'd up his Uncle to see this strange sight;
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The red Petticoat, with a Coyf on his Crown,
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With wonder and laughter did fill the whole town.
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With grief, shame and sorrow his Heart it did bleed,
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Next day up to L ondon he rid with all speed;
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His Cloaths, Watch and Guineas, in hopes to obtain,
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For tho' he did seek her, it was but in vain.
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The Miss had no sooner committed this Crime,
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She shifted her Lodging, it being high time;
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Therefore this young Gallant must patiently bear
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His loss, for to find her he could not tell where.
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